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Bring back Darwin

Parents: beware of shopping carts and escalators

CHICAGO (Reuters) – Shopping carts, escalators and lawn mowers injure 35,000 American children every year and should be redesigned, researchers said on Monday.

Last year in the United States, 24,000 children were hurt badly enough to go to the hospital after falling out of shopping carts or topping over while they rode, a statement from the American Academy of Pediatrics said.

Three-quarters of the injuries were to the head or neck.

Some children got injured when they were trapped in carts, or fell off while riding on the outside or while standing up inside the basket, the report published in the academy's journal, Pediatrics, said.

Well, duh. Every shopping cart I've ever seen has blazoned across the front: “don't allow child to stand in cart”

The group urged doctors to support changes in cart designs. Meanwhile, parents ought to consider using strollers or wagons, shopping online from home or encouraging children to walk when they are old enough to do so.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA – Gee, wouldn't that be a good idea.

Escalators and lawn mowers also cause thousands of injuries to U.S. children each year, reports in Pediatrics said.

Many of the 2,000 annual injuries on escalators occur when a shoe, clothing or a stroller becomes trapped in the space between the moving stairs and the side wall.

Reducing that gap would help, as would having caregivers remove children from strollers before taking an escalator, the report said.

Every escalator I've ever seen CLEARLY says “don't take strollers on escalator.”

Regulations making lawn mowers safer could deter the more than 9,000 injuries sustained each year. Boys suffer nearly four out of five mower injuries, including burns, fractures, and fingers and toes that are lacerated by spinning blades.

Some people are too stupid to live.

7 Comments on “Bring back Darwin

  1. Truly pathetic. What kind of asinine parent uses a stroller on an escalator, or lets their child stand up in a cart???
    Lawnmower injuries – I read somewhere that a large part of them are due to things like sticks or rocks being thrown back out of the mower and back at the person mowing. This is why my husband always wears jeans, socks, shoes, shirt, flannel, and his tres cool safety glasses when he mows. He’s seen too many serious industrial accidents to be stupid and mow just in shorts, and if the kids ever mow a lawn, they’d be told to do the same.
    I do worry about the state of things nowadays when people seem to lack all kinds of common sense o.O

    1. I do worry about the state of things nowadays when people seem to lack all kinds of common sense o.O
      And then expect a re-design of the misused items to compensate for that lack of common sense. e_e *stabbity to the idiot parents*

    2. Every time I got to the mall, I see some bint on the escalator with a stroller. Half the time, with the kid in the stroller.
      And I totally agree with what you say about lawnmowers!

  2. Who in the bloody hell are these people allowing their children ANYWHERE NEAR a lawnmower with spinning blades? Momma said something about Ganon riding the lawnmower with her when he gets older, and I veto’d that right the hell quick. Her lawnmower has all these super-uber safety measures on it (pressure changes on the seat cause the blades to lock instantly), but there is still NO EFFIN’ WAY Ganon is riding a large piece of machinery with giant blades that spin at high velocity. I’m not an over-protective momma, but that is common freaking sense.
    Also: escalators & shopping carts ALL have warnings against precisely what this article mentions. e_e I’m agreed; bring back Darwin, or at least make reading warnings MANDATORY. There should be a test before people are allowed to be parents.

  3. Meanwhile, parents ought to consider using strollers or wagons, shopping online from home or encouraging children to walk when they are old enough to do so.
    “Sweetie, please. Mama is asking you to use your feet.”
    Unbelievable. Or, rather, all too believable, given the fact that I now see school-aged kids (with no visible disability) being wheeled around like little pashas.

  4. If they’re dumb enough to stand up in a shopping cart, then they deserve to fall over the edge and die, especially since, like you said, carts are emblazoned with signs nowadays. If you can’t read, there are even pretty pictures to warn you.

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